when do I go back to work again…


When Do I Go Back To Work Again…

It’s been one of those days.  The type of day where by bedtime you are letting your kids fight to the death or at least until blood is drawn.  The type of day where no one listens and no matter what you do, you can’t out yell the kids.  The type of day where you sit in your room and eat half a box of cookies even though you no you shouldn’t.  Then your oldest looks at you and says “mom you said those have to last, I’m really worried about your diet.”

Now let me finish that thought by saying I have never once told my kids I’m in a diet.  That word has come from my mother’s mouth.  I don’t look at the changes I have made as a diet, because if don’t intend to go back to the way I was.  Despite the fact I ate a whole bunch of cookies today.  It’s okay to sit down and eat a whole box of cookies occasionally.  It’s not ok to sit down and eat a box of cookies every week or even every other week.  I would worry if I didn’t sit down and eat a half of a box of cookies today to be honest.  One bad day didn’t make me fat, one bad day won’t make me fat, just like eating right and exercising one day won’t make me healthy. That’s what I want my kids to learn.  I don’t want them to know the word diet, I want them to be able to look at the big picture and say you know I’ve eaten the last 60 meals healthy and prepared at home it’s ok to go out to a restaurant for dinner, or to know that because they stay healthy, work out and eat healthy that it’s ok to have a second piece of birthday cake on your birthday, that it’s when you eat a whole cake every week and sit down and play games and don’t get up and move that it becomes a problem.

I was raised with a large part of my teenage meals being picked up from Arby’s or McDonalds… I’m talking I had fast food 5 days a week out of convienence.  THAT is what I don’t want them to think is ok.  My mom to this day still doesn’t see a problem with it.  My family would easily go through 2 12 packs of soda a day between 4 of us.  My mom will even now let my kids drink a 2 liter of soda when she watches them (and she has the frequently so it’s more than just a treat).  When I’m home with them they know they can have water or juice and milk with a meal.  I only buy so much milk and juice a week and when it’s gone you can have water.  I know some people think that it cruel, but since when is drinking water bad for you?  Realistically, most people don’t need more than a serving of juice a day, and if you are eating healthy, it’s not necessary to drink a gallon of milk each day either.  

Me, personally, I would rather eat my calories than drink them.  I would take a piece of fruit over a glass of juice 9 out of 10 meals.  I love having cranberry grape juice with pasta, especially alfredo.  It has been forever since I have had alfredo.  It’s probably my favorite meal ever.  It’s one meal that I am not a fan of portion control with and would sit down and eat the whole pot.  Honestly if I had thought today out I would have rather sat down and ate a whole pot of Alfredo than half a pack of cookies.  I’m not sure there would have been too much difference in the carbs… Definitely would have picked up some extra proteins, maybe in a few weeks I will remember this.  Part of learning to live healthy is learning to make choices.

Happy Fathers Day…


Happy Father’s Day…

Today is always a hard day for my little ones.  It’s been over two years since their father has seen them, almost over a year since they have even spoken to him. He couldn’t even manage to send more than a text for their birthdays, which honestly at this point I haven’t even bothered to tell them about, they can hate me later for it.  They see everyone celebrating Father’s Day and they don’t understand why their dad isn’t around, why he doesn’t see them or call.  I do the best I can to be both, but let’s face it, I’m not a guy, it will never be the same.  I’m not close enough to most of my guy friends to let them help out, and the ones that I am close enough to, live too far away to be available.

I know that kids from single parent families frequently turn out just fine, but I also know they are at greater risk for so many things.  I want better for my kids, I want them to be raised right.  I want them to experience all the good things.  It’s just so hard on a single income, where 90% of what little “extra” money I make goes to child care.  My work schedule doesn’t allow for me to get them into sports.  Saturdays are mandatory and pretty much all sports have their games on Saturdays, and if I have to work, I can’t get them there, and it’s not like I can just switch companies, Saturdays are mandatory for my job, not just my company.

So, I encourage you to not just think of the dad’s today, or of the single moms pulling double duty, but think of the kids that have a single parent pulling double duty, that don’t understand why they have a parent that isn’t around.  That don’t get to do all of the fun things because the missing parent doesn’t pay support or see them.  That can’t play sports because the parent has to choose between feeding the family or taking them to a practice or a game.  As hard as it is on me, I think it is that much harder on my kids,